Top Picks ๐ŸŒŸ

These are the designs people love most โ€“ easy picks, great gifts, and safe bets.

If you're not sure where to start, start here. ๐Ÿ’™

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"Crabbit by Choice was an absolutely perfect t-shirt choice for my husband! He was delighted with the slogan and the quality of the t-shirt was first class. I will most definitely be using again."

Why Shop Here?

Made to Order

Printed just for you โ€“ nae waste, nae landfill, just fresh sarcasm on demand.

Free Shipping, Always

No hidden extras. The price you see is the price you pay.

Quality Youโ€™ll Feel

Soft, comfy clothing thatโ€™s built to last โ€“ Standard or Premium.

Born in Scotland

Designed in Fife with a cuppa and a crabbit streak โ€“ worn worldwide.

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Let customers speak for us

from 1548 reviews
Excellent!

Good quality. Great fit. Love it!

Alexandra Little
Scottish T-Shirt โ€“ Slightly Sweary Deeply Scottish Standard Tee
Scottish T-Shirt โ€“ Slightly Sweary Deeply Scottish Standard Tee
This is my third purchase from Sarcastic Scots

This is my third purchase from Sarcastic Scots ,and will definitely not be the last. As usual the quality and design are pure dead brilliant ,and living in England itโ€™s a joy to watch the natives try and work out the language ,canโ€™t recommend them enough

George Vimpany
Funny Scottish T-Shirt โ€“ My People Skills Are Fine Standard Tee
Funny Scottish T-Shirt โ€“ My People Skills Are Fine Standard Tee
Hilarious!

Great graphic and text. The recipient loves it!

Anonymous
Funny Scottish T-Shirt โ€“ My People Skills Are Fine Premium Tee
Funny Scottish T-Shirt โ€“ My People Skills Are Fine Premium Tee
Great quality T-shirts

Great quality and cannot fault this company, shipped quickly and will definitely be buying again

Scott Smith
Scottish T-Shirt โ€“ Slightly Sweary Deeply Scottish Premium Tee
Scottish T-Shirt โ€“ Slightly Sweary Deeply Scottish Premium Tee
Pure dead brilliant! Looks just like my dear (though crabbit) husband

Pure dead brilliant! Looks just like my dear (though crabbit) husband.

Anonymous
Funny Scottish T-Shirt โ€“ Crabbit By Choice Premium Tee
Funny Scottish T-Shirt โ€“ Crabbit By Choice Premium Tee
I love the t shirt and when I wore it everyone

I love the t shirt and when I wore it everyone thought it was great ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

Anonymous
Funny Scottish T-Shirt โ€“ Square Sausage Standard Tee
Funny Scottish T-Shirt โ€“ Square Sausage Standard Tee
Excellent T-shirt and really good quality

I'd definitely recommend Sarcastic Scots the service was excellent, the communication good and the T-shirts are excellent quality, will definitely buy again

Scott Smith
Funny Scottish T-Shirt โ€“ Haud Yer Wheesht Premium Tee
Funny Scottish T-Shirt โ€“ Haud Yer Wheesht Premium Tee
So soft and very comfortable

So soft and very comfortable. I got bought two, I will be back shopping again.

Karen
Scottish Unisex Hoodie โ€“ This Is My Moody Hoodie
Scottish Unisex Hoodie โ€“ This Is My Moody Hoodie
Love it!

Excellent quality, amazing service.Absolutely love it .

Liz Lee
Funny Scottish T-Shirt โ€“ Get Tae Standard Tee
Funny Scottish T-Shirt โ€“ Get Tae Standard Tee
Absolutely loved it and the quality is excellent

Absolutely loved it and the quality is excellent. I will definitely be ordering more from you.

Anne Hands
Scottish Unisex Hoodie โ€“ This Is My Moody Hoodie
Scottish Unisex Hoodie โ€“ This Is My Moody Hoodie
Brilliant

Brilliant-very warm hatand very funny. Has hardly been off my husbandโ€™s head since he got it.

Isleen Campbell
Scottish Embroidered Beanie โ€“ Baldy Heid Cosy
Scottish Embroidered Beanie โ€“ Baldy Heid Cosy
Pure dead brilliant and I love it

Pure dead brilliant and I love it. I like baggy sweatshirts and this fits the bill. Good quality and super logo.

Ruthie
Here I Am Kilting It Sweatshirt
Here I Am Kilting It Sweatshirt
Framed print

Very good quality item and, of course, I love the sentiment! Excellent customer service. The goods arrived within a few days, well packaged.

Elaine McLachlan
Your Ray of Sarcastic Scottish Sunshine Framed Print
Your Ray of Sarcastic Scottish Sunshine Framed Print

Love it really good quality will use again

Davie
Scottish Embroidered Beanie โ€“ Baldy Heid Cosy
Scottish Embroidered Beanie โ€“ Baldy Heid Cosy
Great quality love it

Great quality love it. My daughter now wants one!!!

Julie W
Scottish Unisex Hoodie โ€“ Sarcastic Scottish Sunshine
Scottish Unisex Hoodie โ€“ Sarcastic Scottish Sunshine

Shop By Mood! ๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ’ฌ

(Because some days yer crabbit, and other days yer worse.)

Naebodyโ€™s one mood all the time, so why should your wardrobe be?

Whether youโ€™re feeling crabbit, sarcastic, proud, or just here for the banter โ€” pick the vibe that suits your day and wear it wiโ€™ pride.

Scottish humour, local pride, and top-quality T-Shirts for every mood under the raincloud.

Fancy joining the newsletter? Youโ€™ll find the sign-up at the bottom of every page. ๐Ÿ’™

Hiya, Iโ€™m Sharon ๐Ÿ‘‹

I run Sarcastic Scots โ€” a one-woman brand (with a wee supervisor ๐Ÿพ) turning Scottish humour, sarcasm, and a healthy dose of crabbiness into things folk actually want to wear.

Everything here is made to order, which means it can take a wee bit longer โ€” but it also means less waste and better quality.

If youโ€™re not sure where to start, my Top Picks above are a great place to begin.

Shop Best Sellers ๐ŸŒŸ

New & Worth a Look ๐Ÿ‘€

Shop Best Sellers ๐ŸŒŸShop All New โœจ

Not sure what theyโ€™d like?

  • Let them choose their own banter with a Sarcastic Scots Gift Card. Delivered instantly by email.
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Customers rate us 5.0/5 based on 1548 reviews.

Sarcastic Scots brings you Scottish-themed T-Shirts packed with wit, banter, and proper crabbit energy.

From sarcastic slogans to iconic Scottish humour, these designs are made for those who appreciate a laugh - and a comfy T-Shirt.

Shop unique, Scottish-inspired T-Shirts, Sweatshirts, and Hoodies, printed to order and delivered worldwide. Proudly serving banter since 2025, because serious is overrated.

๐Ÿด๓ ง๓ ข๓ ณ๓ ฃ๓ ด๓ ฟ Designed in Scotland - perfect for gifting, or just treating yourself. ๐Ÿด๓ ง๓ ข๓ ณ๓ ฃ๓ ด๓ ฟ

How It Works

1. Pick your design & size
2. It gets printed just for you
3. Shipped to your door after production

Easy peasy.

  • If your item comes damaged or wrong, (which is very rare) Iโ€™ll do my best to right it. No faff, just telling the truth like we Scots do. ๐Ÿ’™
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